Canal РУСАЛКІНЕ РАДІО - @mermaidradio - №178
Ariella killed her dream.Here’s what’s happened. Ariella had a cute home assignment: prepare a video where you explain how to multiply by ten and hundred in English. She took a creative approach. My sister and her did a video where she teaches all her fully toys all these rules. Ariella asked them questions, replied on their behalf with a funny distorted voice. And then to top it up, she did a “dance break”: suddenly, Ariella started dancing Macarena dance to entertain her viewers. She was so freakishly good and confident, that I dropped my jaw.That night Ariella was so excited, couldn’t stop blabbering on how I shoudwake her up super early, so she shared her work with the whole world.I could see proud and true happiness in her eyes. Her energy was glowing.The first thing she said today upon returning home was:“I didn’t show them my video. I didn’t feel like it. But that’s okay, almost no one did”.She said those words with a colorless voice.My heart skipped a bit. And so did hers, I could tell.That very second I saw myself in her pain.I saw how many times I blocked my creative self-expression because of the fear. Fear of being laughed at. Fear of being considered a mediocrity. Fear that no one would care. This is too painful to see in the person you love the most. I mean, Ariella is made of stardust. How could she ever, ever doubt her talent, even for a second? Now that I think of it, her birth was my jumpstart to begin writing. I didn’t have a specific goal or intention: I just let my thoughts flow on the screen or paper. Somehow the words beautifully arranged themselves into sentences, meaningful messages, and I felt an immense relief when I finished every single piece.Later I created a telegram channel called Mermaid Radio, where I shared my world of self-expression.Back when I was working with Navi my talent was noticed and appreciated.Every now and then I work with texts, because this is simply something I love to do.But I got scared too.So many, painfully many times had I stopped myself from posting something crucial.My inner critic was merciless. With the voices of those who I feared, he deliberately killed my attempts until I was done trying.Hell, I forbade myself from posting my songs so many times, because I was so afraid.Being naked in the public is a piece of cake compared to the complexity of horrors that my brain produced every second of my living.Now I see how wrong I was. My soul was blocked, and I participated in this crime.Ariella is my greatest teacher. Today she taught me something I needed for many years.I won’t let you down.And you, my little mermaid, will never ever be scared of your beautiful work, because everything you do is divine.🤍🪽
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25-01-22 19:21